Emily’s Musings

Dear Hannah,

You are now 22 months old. Our family has had some big changes in the past two months, so this letter will have many pictures to show your development, and the major life changes you have endured like a champ.

First, your daddy graduated from the basic science program at Saba University School of Medicine. What does this mean? He is half way through med school which makes him half a doctor, or as we like to to call him, a “tor.” He will earn the “Doc” part when he graduates in 2010 when he becomes a REAL DOCTOR. We all can’t wait for that day.

With all big accomplishments, come big changes. That meant we had to leave our beautiful home on Saba, in the Caribbean. Saba was your first home. You have grown up as a Caribbean baby, playing with rocks, geckos, iguanas, and swimming in the ocean. As much as we loved it there, the only reason we could live in the Dutch West Indies for an extended period of time is if your dad was in school. Since he finished the program (thank goodness for that! I I would DIE if he became an eternal or professional student) we have moved back to the states where he will do clinical rotations.

(This is what a Caribbean baby tan looks like compared to a Utah baby tan.)

The whole family (including the whining dogs) arrived in Texas at the end of April. You traveled so well. It took 19 hours to get from our doorstep on Saba, to Daniel and Lydia’s doorstep in Texas. Not once did you have a meltdown, or cry, or bother the other passengers traveling on our plane. I owe you BIG TIME for that. Someday you are going to read this, and I’m sure you will remind me of how you were such a calm and easy baby, and then your are going to ask for something BIG. I know it.

We went sailing with a friend of ours in Texas. (Who is a dentist and tried relentlessly to convince your dad to go to dental school instead of medical school. He now refers to your daddy as a “real doctor” because apparently, dentist’s aren’t real doctors.) You LOVE boats, and the ocean, so we thought you would be very excited about this sailing excursion.

However, about five minutes into the sail, you said, “All done?” SEVERAL TIMES. Then you would point out other boats on the water and say, “SEE EM!” with all the energy you could find in your little body. I don’t think you realized you WERE ON A BOAT. When I pointed out the water, and told you we were on the ocean, you shook your head and said, “No?” I know I was telling a little white lie, like moms do from time to time, (like when you demand more marshmallows, and I tell you they are all gone even though there is an entire bag waiting for you in the pantry). You are smart enough to know the Caribbean ocean is CLEAR, and turquoise, not dark blue, and murky. When your daddy took you to the front of the sail boat, you looked back at me and said, “FUN!” Good, I’m glad you finally figured out what were were doing was fun.

It has been very interesting to see the world change through your eyes. The first couple of days in Texas, you asked me to go swimming, and you kept looking out the back sliding door asking me about the ocean. You would say, “Ocean? Go?” Again, and again. It broke my heart to tell you the ocean was all gone. You no longer talk about geckos, iguanas, the ocean, or going swimming. It makes me sad to think of the life we left, but it also gives me comfort that you have adapted to your new life of BIKES, WALKS, and SWINGS. THIS IS ALL YOU TALK ABOUT. ALL DAY. EVERY DAY.

(I’d like to point out that your dad put your hair in pig tails on this day. He is multi-talented.)

You are still obsessed with “messes.” Part of having fun at the park is cleaning off EVERY WOOD CHIP, ON EVERY STAIR.

Texas is known for BIG TRUCKS. In fact, I think Texas alone supports the BIG TRUCK industry. Driving around town, you would yell, “TRUCK!” every time you saw a truck. Which was like every other vehicle.

While eating at Taco Bell, (I had to have it because your baby brother was TOTALLY craving it and I had been deprived of such fine cuisine for over two years) you noticed some balloons tied to the back of all the chairs. I am embarrassed to say this, but at almost two years old, YOU HAD NEVER SEEN A BALLOON. You looked very thoughtfully at them and then exclaimed, “CIRCLES!” Yes, they are indeed circles that float up in the air. You poor thing, I will have TONS of balloons at your birthday party in two months. That is if my pregnant brain can remember something that important. You affectionately call them “a banoon.” Yes, you put an article in front of “banoon” every time you talk about them.

You are an excellent sleeper. In fact, I think your grandparents might start asking you for advice on how to sleep 12 hours a night. There was one night of adjustment when we got to Texas, and you had a meltdown when we put you in a Pak N’ Play at Daniel and Lydia’s house. I would ask you, “Where is Hannah’s bed?” and you would point to the portable crib, and cry, “Hannah’s bed!” Then I would ask you where mommy’s bed was, and you would point to the bed and cry, “Mommy’s!” After establishing the bed assignments, you relented, and went to bed just fine.

You were an excellent traveler driving from Texas to Utah. You sat for 22 hours, and really, I don’t even have the patience for that. We are now staying at your Grandma and Grandpa Lesher’s house in Utah. You made yourself at home quite quickly, living by the “toddler rule” which is, “WHAT’S MINE IS MINE, AND WHAT’S YOURS IS MINE.” Several times throughout the day, you will say, “Hannah’s!” Just to make sure that I KNOW WHAT YOUR PROPERTY LOOKS LIKE. It is amazing how much stuff is yours anyway, like kitchen utensils, tweezers, and the T.V. remote control. Speaking of the T.V., you never showed any interest in watching it on Saba. However, since finding grandpa’s (who you call “Demnis”) “Chase Lounge Chair,” you LOVE to watch T.V.

You’ll watch anything really. You just love to relax on that piece of furniture and tell grandma “watch it!” Because obviously it is grandma’s responsibility to turn the T.V. on for you. You follow your Grandma Gloria around all the time and tell her what to do. We refer to you as her “shadow.” You usually convince her to go for a walk, or to the playground by saying, “COME ON!” No one, even your grandma who has a bad back and is recovering from knee surgery, can resist your enthusiasm and charm.

You used your special charm on your grandpa “Demnis” by talking about bikes, ALL DAY LONG. You would look at him and nod your head yes, and say “BIKE!” with such enthusiasm, that he could not resist your darling little face. It only took two days of taking about bikes, and Dennis drove you down to the store and let you pick out a bike. WE ARE ALL GRATEFUL TO HIM. WE COULD NOT LOOK AT YOUR INNOCENT FACE ASKING ABOUT A BIKE ANYMORE.

You love to give us updates on your whereabouts or physical wellbeing. You point out when you get a “bonk” and then say, “Okay?” Just so that we know you are indeed, OKAY. If the injury is in need of a kiss, you will walk up to the closest adult and say, “kiss it?” Most of the time, we don’t know you had a “bonk,” but we are always glad for the update.

You are very sweet to me, and point out where baby brother is ALL THE TIME. Probably because you can’t miss my belly, and that is indeed where he is. You kiss my tummy, and then point out that you also have a baby in your belly. Fortunately, you just have a belly with no baby.

You love to exercise on Grandma and Grandpa’s machines. You have named one machine “Daddy’s” and one machine “Mommy’s and Grandma’s.” Because obviously, those are the only machines we work out on.

Your hair was a mop. Well, more like a BIG MESS, and I know how you feel about messes. Your aunt Rachelle cut your hair the other day, giving it some shape. You had no idea what was going on, you just wanted to play with your tea set. You didn’t sit very still, but your hair turned out darling.

You attended nursery at church for the first time a few weeks ago. I knew you would like it, but I was totally wrong. BECAUSE YOU LOVED IT. What more could a kid want besides toys, other kids to play with, and snacks? When I went in to pick you up after your first time attending, you took one look at me and said, “GO AWAY!” That’s always a nice way to greet your mom. WHO ENDURED 30 HOURS OF LABOR, 40 PREGNANCY POUNDS, AND MAJOR MASTITIS FROM THE GET GO. Maybe you turned out to be such a good sleeper and traveler to even the score. I guess I don’t owe you big time anymore.

A few weeks ago, your dad and I had a Family Home Evening (commonly referred to as F.H.E. where we talk and learn about gospel principles) and I showed you a picture of Jesus being baptized by John the Baptist in the River Jordan. You took one look at the picture and said with exuberance, “JESUS! SWINGING!” which really means “swimming.” You are so innocent and darling, your dad and I couldn’t help but laugh. And yes, Jesus was indeed sort of swimming in the picture.

You are bursting with words every day, and copy everything we do. We love you so much, and we hope you will happily share us with your little brother when he arrives in a few weeks.

Here are some of your new words:

• I need it!
• See it?
• Get it?
• See ‘em?
• I did it!
• Watch it!
• Prayers
• Truck!
• Flag!
• Close it
• Church
• Focus
• Make it!
• Come on!
• Come ‘ere!
• All done?

We love you so much!

Love,

Mommy

Daniel and Lydia had their baby last Monday (exactly one week ago) in Fort Worth, Texas.  I am a little late posting this, but I am not entirely lame because I am posting about it now.

This is the paragraph where I would write about how fun and cute she is, and how the new parents are coping.  But since I fled Texas about two weeks ago, I can’t tell you about any of that stuff because I am not there to exaggerate write about this exciting time for them.

David and I are so proud of them.  Not only did they birth a baby after 14 years of swearing off kids, but they ACTUALLY DECIDED ON A NAME.  The Goutchkoff - Tague household did not give their child 10 first names, or even two last names . . . I am still in shock over that one.  The name was undecided (even the last name) until she was born.  I’m just so glad her parents MADE a decision and I can call her by name instead of “Lydia and Daniel’s baby.”

Here she is:

Darby Rose Tague.  Born Monday, May 12, 2008.  Weighing in at 7 lbs. 11 oz.

She is so cute!  I just want to kiss those cheeks and touch her soft hair!  Congratulations Daniel and Lydia!  We’re so glad you are part of the “parenting world!”

I am indeed alive. Life has taken some crazy turns in the last few days, and I have not taken the time to sit down and write about it. Here’s the crazy stuff: I am currently in Utah, which was NOT part of of the plan as of last Sunday. I am on “extra rest” (not to be confused with bed rest), and I actually had to live without internet access for TWO WHOLE DAYS. That was torture.

Why am I in Utah? Why is it mandatory that I relax? And WHY ON EARTH DID I HAVE TO GO WITHOUT THE INTERNET? Yeah, I’m still bummed about that last one.

I ended up in the emergency room on Sunday night. I learned something interesting about being pregnant. If you are pregnant, and end up going to the emergency room, you are treated like a V.I.P. You don’t actually wait in the “real emergency room.” You are taken to the maternity ward and are seen immediately. That was nice. I’m not a night person, so sitting around waiting and waiting to be seen by some doctor was not something I had to endure. Because this is a public blog, and there are many readers I don’t know, I will not go into all the personal gory details of why I went to the emergency room, what happened, and what I was told to expect throughout the last eight weeks of this pregnancy. I’m just not that kind of girl that spills all of my personal health issues to perfect strangers. Even if they are interested.

However, I will say that I had three ultrasounds on Sunday night. Each machine fancier and more detailed than the previous. The baby is fine, but I need “extra rest” (which shouldn’t be a problem since I mastered the art of LAZINESS in the Caribbean), and I can’t lift anything over 10 pounds. Hannah is a TANK, weighing in a 31 pounds, so I can’t lift her. This posed a problem when I told the doctor my husband was leaving the next day (Monday) to drive to Utah with our two dogs, all of our hud, and I was staying in Texas for a couple  more weeks to help a friend of mine with her new baby (who was due yesterday, but still hasn’t delivered.) I obviously couldn’t care for Hannah 100% (since I couldn’t lift her into her crib) and I would have big problems at the airport because I couldn’t lift/carry anything over 10 pounds (which is probably what my purse weighs), or carry Hannah through security, or lift her onto my lap while flying.

I felt terrible to leave Lydia at such a crucial time in her life, but I knew I had to take care of myself, or I could very possibly end up with a pre-term baby. We arrived home from the ER at 12:30 AM, and by 1:00 PM Texas time, the whole family (including one sedated dog, Kyaha, who vomits in the car unless given drugs) headed for Utah.

We made the 19 hour drive in 22 hours. We stayed overnight at a ghetto Motel 6 in Albuquerque, New Mexico (because it is pet friendly) and my skin just crawls with yuckiness as I think about it. I’m just not a Motel 6 kind of girl. Never have been, and never will be. As per doctor instructions, we stopped every two hours so I could walk around for 10 minutes. But trust me, my 7 month pregnant bladder was the boss of this trip, and at times, two hours was a VERY LONG TIME between potty breaks. Hannah and the dogs also enjoyed all the stops. We all got to walk around many different parking lots, like crazy people, walking in circles, with no purpose.

Hannah was an excellent traveler, and she only protested getting in the car once. After 20 1/2 hours of driving, she had ENOUGH. She told us in toddler terms (you know, like a TANTRUM) THERE IS NO WAY YOU’RE GETTING ME BACK INTO THAT CAR SEAT! We were in Price, Utah at this time, and we convinced her that grandma had toys, and LOTS OF THEM. She talked about toys and grandma for 90 straight minutes. The second she walked through the door of David’s parents’ house, there was no “Hi!,” or hug from Hannah, she immediately demanded, “TOYS!”

Boy am I glad this house is stocked with good toys. I’m sure Hannah would never have forgiven us for lying to her about such an important thing.

We obviously had no internet while we were traveling for 22 hours and of course, the ghetto place we stayed did not offer such a luxury. We couldn’t even pick up the wireless from the lobby. Maybe they don’t have internet. I wouldn’t be surprised.

We have been in Utah for three days now. David took a day to do a bunch of paperwork (like getting us on insurance) to get us settled in here as residents. I have unpacked everything, and as of this afternoon, we don’t have piles of stuff on the floor of our bedroom. I can’t live with piles. Everything has a place, and when I’m too tired to put things back in their place, I tell my full time assistant (David) to put things back in their proper place. He is very good at tasks I give him. I’d like to think that he feels the same way about clutter that I do, but something tells me he doesn’t like the crazy person I turn into when things are out of place. Whatever the motivation, at least the job gets done. Right?

It feels good to be settled. I meet with the doctor next week who I plan to use to deliver this baby, (I sure hope I like him. At 32 weeks prego, I can’t be too picky and change this late in the game) and hopefully he gives me good news. I don’t mind the “extra rest” business, but I really want to pick up my daughter. I hope these restrictions are just temporary and not for the next eight weeks.

We have been eating like royalty since we arrived. Everyone we see wants to go out to eat, or feed us, so I’m positive I will have “more belly than baby” before I go to Utah. This week, we met up with some old business partners, Dianna and Eric. She would alter all the wedding and formal gowns for our customers. She is amazing with fabric, and truly has an “eye” for altering wedding gowns. They are such an incredible couple with such an amazing story.

They emigrated from Russia about 15 years ago with their two toddler children, mother-in-law, and $1,000 in their pocket, and the dream of living in the land of the free where they could work for themselves. After paying off the Russian mafia during their travels, they landed in the Dallas area. Dianna used to work in a sweat shop in Russia, so they opened up an alteration store because that was the only way they thought they could make money. With no education and a thick Russian accent, this seemed like their only option. Really, they wanted to LIVE the American dream; Entrepreneurship

This is Dianna.

All of the walls in her alteration shop are filled with pictures of her clients.

This is her “beauty queen wall.” Anyone, who is anyone, will only allow Dianna to touch their gown. She is absolutely amazing. She alters the gowns of all celebrities in the Dallas area. One of the many celebrities she has worked with is LeAnn Rimes. She altered her Vera Wang wedding gown when she got married. There are more celebrities, but I am pregnant, and can’t think of them.

Notice how my picture is on the wall? Yeah, it is on the end of the middle row. I should get her another picture, so my head isn’t cut off. (BTW, Dianna didn’t recognize “island Emily” with no makeup, flip flops, hair in a ponytail and pregnant, when I popped in for a surprise visit a few days ago. Her store was FULL of customers and she exclaimed, “Emily, you don’t look same! You VERY different. I don’t recognize you. You see? Yes, Exactly.” She then pointed to my picture on the wall of what I should look like. Dianna doesn’t mince words.)

This is Eric. He opened up a Paciugo franchise last year. It is doing well, and we certainly enjoyed eating the gourmet Italian ice cream!

This is Eric’s franchise. When David asked him why he opened up a franchise, he said he couldn’t do anything else! With no education, a thick Russian accent, and a desire to retire his wife from the alteration business, he felt his only option was to open a franchise because the “company leads you by the hand.”

All we could say was “WOW.” How many Americans out there specifically don’t open their own business because they think they don’t have enough education, or experience? This is what I love about this couple, THEY HAVE DRIVE. I relate to that. They jump in head first, and MAKE IT WORK. Props to all the immigrants who are living the American dream.

Fifteen years later, their accents haven’t changed much. It still takes a fine tuned ear to understand them. We went to dinner at Texas Land and Cattle (because David REALLY wanted to eat some great steak, but the food paled in comparison to the Gatehouse steak. We are ruined for life.) and I had to clarify everything Eric and Dianna ordered to the waiter. The waiter CLEARLY didn’t understand. Hey, I relate. I used to nod my head at everything they said when I first met them.

David and I both ordered IBC root beer. IT IS THE KING OF ALL ROOT BEERS. We have been deprived of this little luxury for 28 months, and it was DELICIOUS. Poor Eric and Dianna, they have never tried root beer in all their years living in the States. We offered for them to try it, but in true Russian taste, they turned it down to drink their Vodka and Margarita. It’s too bad they don’t know what they’re missing!

Anyone who is anyone, knows where all the great shopping is in Dallas. Right after David and I moved to Texas, I met a girl at church and I complimented her on her jewelry. Very casually, she said she bought it at Sam Moon, like everyone knew that store. When I asked her, “What is that?” she GASPED and said, “You don’t know what Sam Moon is?” Um . . . NO I DON’T.

She went on to tell me all about it and of course, I HAD TO GO THERE. My cousin that lives in this area also LOVES to shop at Sam Moon, (as well as the entire Metroplex) and she also gasped when she found out I had been living in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area for two weeks and HAD NOT BEEN THERE. It’s like not knowing where the airport is, and the equivalent of never hearing of “The Gap” or “Target.”

Sam Moon is located in an Asian community of Dallas. It is about 45 minutes away from where I lived, and where I am currently staying. It is full of handbags (perfect for me who LOVES handbags), jewelry, accessories, and really, anything you can think of. When people visited us in Texas, going to Sam Moon was definitely a tourist stop. When people returned to visit us in Texas, Sam Moon was the first place they wanted to go! I used to fly an employee of Allyse’s Bridal down to my store a few times a year to help out at bridal shows, and I swear to you, the ONLY reason she would come (other than to hang out with me) was to go shopping at Sam Moon.

It is normal to feel overstimulated when you walk through the doors and see THOUSANDS (okay, more like HUNDREDS) of women shopping around like maniacs, picking up great finds at great prices. My previous business partner, Allyse (who used to own Allyse’s Bridal at University Mall) described the shoppers as ants on an ant hill. That is how busy it is. She too was amazed at the cheap prices.

Obviously, a visit to Dallas would be totally LAME if I didn’t go to Sam Moon. David (who didn’t complain at all about all the shopping) and Hannah went with me just to see what we could find. I was looking for a purse that I could use as a diaper bag. Because really, why do you need a vinyl one? It’s not like your kid actually uses the bag. You just need a bag big enough to hold all your purse crap and baby necessities. This is what I found:

Now, I would like to make a comment. I really like this bag. However, others obviously do not share my same taste. Some people, (ahem, Jenn, Jess, and Lydia) think this bag is not cute. Maybe it’s not the style in Southern California, but I will say that I saw several styles of this bag, in this print, in Miami last week. Plus, it is big enough to hold all my junk, and both of my kid’s junk. Price $22. Now do you like it?

Also, I bought another bag that could double as a diaper bag (you know, because ONE bag is not sufficient) and this is what I picked up:

This bag was $8.

If you have an opinion on these bags, let me know. I still have time to exchange them before I leave Texas. I don’t want to be that girl walking around with the atrocious bag, and everyone knows it, but her.

We’re in “The Republic of Texas.”  It only took 19 hours to travel from our doorstep on Saba to Daniel and Lydia’s house in Texas, but hey, the whole family made it, including Paris and all her whining.  Hannah was an excellent traveler and only had one melt down on the way.  She was SICK AND TIRED of being buckled into her stroller, and being confined at all times.  SHE JUST WANTED TO GO ON A DANG WALK, and meet new people, and say “hi!” to everyone, and dance, and shake her bum-bum, and ALL of the aforementioned activities are almost impossible to do when you are strapped down in a stroller, with parental supervision.

It was a very stress free day of travel.  What a relief for us!  David and I were both able to get on the same flight leaving Saba, and ALL of our luggage and both dogs were also on the same flight.  THAT ALONE IS A MIRACLE.  The airline that flies in and out of Saba only allows one pet per flight, and luckily for us, they made an exception.  I’d like to think the favors given to us by the staff at the airport were because they liked us, or knew our names, not just our faces, but that probably isn’t the case.  I think it’s because Hannah is a charmer.  She always smiles, waves, and says “take care!” to the employees when we leave that tiny airport, and I think she is the reason they felt so compelled to give us a break.  We weren’t charged for the dogs, or overweight luggage.  I want to go back to Saba just to say, “Thank you” to them one more time, for making our trip that much easier.

Flying from Saba is always complicated in some way.  Fortunately, the winds were favorable enough for the plane to land (they were projected to be unfavorable, making it impossible for us to leave the island) and we were at the Sint Maarten airport at 8:00.  We had a WHOLE LOTTA TIME TO KILL with a toddler, two dogs, and four pieces of luggage.  That’s right, our whole lives fit into FOUR pieces of luggage.  In fact,  we had extra room in the luggage, (which is just a shock really) and I was able to bring home my vegetable steamer.  Which I love, to death.  Honestly, I wasn’t concerned about my blow dryer fitting into the luggage, but the steamer, that was a priority.  I couldn’t live without it before moving to Saba, and leaving Saba was no different.  Initially, I had just planned to leave the steamer and buy another one when we returned to the states, but since there was room in the luggage, I just saved myself some money!  Which could go toward something else I need . . . and I just can’t start naming other things that I “need” because after being on a glorified camping trip for two years, I “NEED” everything!

Being a toddler is BIG WORK and Hannah is happy to show you just how hard it is to hang out in a stroller, saying “hi!” to everyone, and dancing to the Caribbean beat.  Since we had SIX HOURS to kill, she decided to take a little snooze at the airport.

Hannah requires four items to go to sleep.  If one of the items is missing, then the delicate balance is ruined and she JUST CAN’T SLEEP.  She has to have her Pooh Bear, soft tag blanket, her bear blanket (not shown) and her DANG BINKIE.  She HAS to have her binkie to go to sleep.  It is the only time she gets it, and every time she lies down for a nap she says, “BINKIE!” and every time she puts it into her mouth we tell her “You don’t need this DUMB thing!” but then we have to give it to her because we know she will fall asleep within minutes.  And really, this is a battle not worth fighting right now.

Arriving early for our flight made check in a breeze, and American Airlines was so helpful.  They didn’t charge us for the extra piece of luggage we checked, and they took dang good care of our dogs while they were out of our care.

During our LONG wait at the airport, we David took Hannah, and our girls for a walk.  He was the designated walker, and I was the designated spectator photographer, sitting with the luggage, and the kennels.

If you want to know how hot it was, just check out the dogs’ tongues.

When we arrived at DFW airport, we were so excited to see Daniel and 8 1/2 months pregnant Lydia (who professed she would never have kids . . . Ha!  Ha!) I got a second wind of energy.  Our pups were excellent travelers, and I was so relived to have all our luggage, dogs, and family together, in one place.  One piece of luggage went missing in Miami during customs, but it magically showed up on our doorstep this evening. We are very happy to be here, in one piece.

I can’t believe the time has finally come for us to move on from our life on Saba.  I have seen so many friends and students move back to “reality” during our two year stay, and I am so happy our turn has come!  Yesterday was full of bittersweet emotion as we left our house on Saba, but I do look forward to the next chapter in the “Adventures of the Leshers.”  Whenever I think about the beautiful island life we left behind, I have to think, “I can buy grapes, bananas, milk, and ANYTHING I can imagine, ANY DAY of the week.”  That thought alone will keep me going. 

The time has finally come to leave this island of paradise. Our internet will be turned off shortly, and I will have no communication with the outside world until I land in Dallas. Which will be about midnight, and I will be exhausted from traveling ALL DAY with a toddler, pregnant belly, two dogs, lots of luggage, and an adorable husband. Poor Dave, he is going to have to carry everything because pregnant women are strictly advised NOT TO CARRY/LIFT anything over 40 pounds . . . and I ALWAYS try to follow the rules if it means getting out of manual labor . . .

While we have throughly loved our time on Saba, we are ready to start the next chapter of our lives. We look forward to seeing so many of our friends and family in the upcoming weeks.

David took some great pictures of the moon the other night. The lights you see off in the distance are on the islands of Statia, and St. Kitts. I think this is a great way to sign off . . .

Good night moon . . .

Good night stars, good night air. Good night noises everywhere.

You know, since we sold our telescope and binoculars, I have lost my touch as “Mrs. Kravitz” of Hells Gate. From the perch on my patio, I usually have a pretty good pulse of this side of the island. I know useless information important things like, which taxi drivers are giving a tour of Saba, who is and is not home, and when/if the boats are coming (even in bad weather) to dock. My patio has given me a wonderful view to watch the comings and goings of everything. I have made it my personal responsibility to be “in the know” so I can pass along Hells Gate gossip reliable information to people who want to know. People often call me to find out if the plane is landing and if it is running on time, how the ocean looks for cliff diving or snorkeling, or if I can tell if someone is home way down the road.

Today was a PERFECT day to be a nosy Mrs. Kravitz when David and I saw something out in the ocean that was very mysterious. Thanks to the selling of our spy equipment, we had to rely on our eyes to determine what the mysterious floating object was. We grabbed our camera, and this is what we saw:

Now, I would just like to point out that this IS IN FACT, an OIL RIG (for those of you who don’t know). I had never seen one until I moved to Texas, and until today, I had never seen one OUTSIDE of Texas. If you look closely, you can see two tug boats pulling this oil rig across the ocean.

Life is full of unanswered questions like, how many Dr. Peppers will cure a headache? Or, how long will Paris (my dog) lick my feet before getting bored? How many more poopie diapers will I change before Hannah is potty trained? Today, poses another “unanswered question.” WHERE IN THE WORLD WOULD IT BE SO IMPORTANT TO HAVE AN OIL RIG DRAGGED ACROSS THE BIG BLUE SEA? Yeah, I’m stumped.

I must confess. Sometimes I turn on the TV, for no reason in particular other than to fry perfectly good brain cells. Tonight was just one of those nights. I turned on TLC and a show called “Say Yes to the Dress” was on. I had never heard of it, but as I started watching I became very intrigued. Not only because it was all about a bridal salon selling wedding gowns, but because the store looked vaguely familiar. Then, I noticed the owners of the store. Um, yes, the bridal industry is a small world. I recognized the owners of the shop, therefore telling me where the show was being filmed. Kleinfeld’s in New York. This is by far the largest, most elite bridal salon in the USA.

You see, in my previous life, (when I put on make up, wore great clothing, and went to work) I actually owned a bridal salon in Dallas, Texas. I was involved in every aspect of the business from hiring, training, floor sets, marketing, advertising, and selling, to the designing of wedding gowns. I would see a dress sketched out on paper, and then have that exact dress on my floor ready to sell in nine months. Yes, I secretly was a Jane of all trades in this business. Both David and I experienced SERIOUS BURNOUT in this business. I AM SO GLAD I DON’T HAVE TO WORK WITH BRIDES ANYMORE. Thank goodness for the burnout though. It caused both of us to evaluate our current and future life very seriously. After a good long, hard evaluation, we both felt right about getting out of our business, selling the house, and car (we kept one) to move to a deserted island in the middle of the ocean so David could start Medical School. Yeah, I’m still scratchin’ my head on this one.

As I was watching this show, I desperately wanted to turn it off, but I couldn’t! How could I look away? It was like watching a reality TV show filmed in my old store, except I was missing. From the emotional brides to the flat out CRAZY brides, I have dealt with them all. They also highlighted the alteration department, and truthfully, any alteration department in ANY STORE could hold a reality show on its own. The DRAMA that exists in just that one place is enough to make you go gray early, or possibly loose 15 pounds from stress. (Not recommended for a diet plan)

Needless to say, watching this show CONFIRMED to me why I am SO GLAD we are no longer in that business. What a headache.

Our time on this island comes to a close in seven weeks. Really, it’s sort of weird. This place feels like home. Our family expanded here, and honestly, I feel like a local. I have been quite nostalgic lately. Watching every plane land, enjoying every rain storm, smelling every flower, savoring the wonderful view from my patio and enjoying the mild temperature. It kind of makes me sad to think I won’t always be a stranded-housewife-of-a-medical-student-living-on-a-deserted-island-forever. To bring myself back to reality, I started a list of things I’m not going to miss on Saba, and things I look forward too in the states . . . just to keep my perspective real.

Not Going to Miss:

• Paying $5.50 a gallon for gasoline
• Paying $12.00 a gallon for milk
• Paying $80 a month for S-L-O-W internet
• Monthly grocery bill of $800 (for two adults and one little person)
• Paying to make local phone calls
• Walking up hill BOTH WAYS
• No access to a Vet
• Bathrooms that smell like pee (since you can only flush when it’s brown. True story.)
• Weekly power outages
• Hanging my laundry to dry
• Hand washing dishes
• Taking an “army shower” to conserve on water
• The very uncomfortable bed in this house

Looking Forward to:

• Paying a LOT less for groceries
• Sleeping in my OWN BED
• Living on MY OWN FURNITURE
• Shopping. Any kind
• Going out to eat at fast food places (they don’t exist here)
• Eating out at Posado’s in Texas
• Going to Michaels Craft and finding projects to do
• Taking Hannah for a walk on a FLAT SIDEWALK
• Seeing the American flag everywhere
• Driving my car (that currently lives in storage) that has AIR CONDITIONING and a STEREO (What a luxury, right?)
• Flushing the toilet every time I pee (Which is like 80 times a day now that I’m pregnant)
• Cooking in a kitchen that has more than three square feet of counter space.
• CENTRAL AIR CONDITIONING

I truly don’t think I’m too demanding. I have missed a few creature comforts these last few years, and DANG IT, I CAN’T WAIT TO HAVE THEM AGAIN!