Miniature Land

My parents are coming to visit us on Saba! Yes, I am still picking my jaw off the ground, and am trying to recover from shock. It is true, the day has finally arrived! They are coming to see “their baby” which of course is not me. They have been suckered in by Hannah’s good looks and personality. They are addicted to her and need another dose! Hey, whatever the reason they have finally decided to come (maybe they realize that I don’t live in Hell, just Hells Gate), I am not complaining!

My dad made a funny comment about Saba that I can’t get out of my head. He said, “I feel like I am going to miniature land. Everything there is small, the cars, your house, the island, everything!” He brought up a good point. We do live in “miniature land”! I did love those Micro Machine Cars as a kid. Maybe this is my adult dream come true to live in the land of miniature!

This island might only be five square miles, but it will take you at least 20 minutes to drive from one side of the island to the other. How is that possible you ask? Well, there are nine miles of road and the average speed you travel is 20 miles per hour. I actually have no idea how fast I usually travel in my car because my speedometer doesn’t work. Speed is whatever you deem “reasonable and prudent”. That of course is subjective to everyone. The island itself enforces it own speed limit by its curvy and crazy road.

My house is 540 square feet. Spacious right? Our patio is as big as our house. In our miniature house we have four rooms. Two bedrooms are both too small to accommodate a queen size bed. Both bedrooms have full size beds and they are pushed against the wall. The third room is the kitchen/dining/family room. The fourth room is the bathroom. We have named it the “bathroom of convenience”. You can go to the bathroom, wash your hands, and shower all at the same time. It is a lovely blue….all of it is blue. Blue sink, tile, and toilet. Yikes! The best part though is the fact that you can see the blue ocean from the bathroom. The benefit you ask? While you practice personal hygiene, you can enjoy the beauty of nature. Kind of like camping, I still sometimes feel like I am camping here.

Our car is a gutsy little thing. All cars are small here. Unlike Texas where “bigger is better”, on Saba the philosophy is the “smaller the better”. No one wants a big car, what a nightmare! It would be scratched and destroyed every day by the rock wall and other passing cars on the narrow one and a half lane road. Here we talk about our narrow and short cars with pride! This must be hard for my fellow Texans to understand. There are no real Texas trucks here!

There are a few other things that put Saba on the miniature map: restaurants on average can hold a maximum of 40 people. Grocery stores are the size of American gas stations. The hospital has one Doctor, and one registered nurse. The bank lobby can hold about 6 people, no more! Saba has the shortest commercial runway in the world. The airplane can hold a maximum of 17 passengers. There is one gas station here, two ferries traveling back and forth from Sint Maarten, three banks, four villages, and five flights a day in and out of Saba.

I have really come to enjoy this miniature land and lifestyle. I think I will go make dinner on my miniature stove, and eat it on my miniature patio and enjoy the view of six islands looking back at me. For such a small place, I can see five different countries. Does that sound miniature to you?

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